Wherever is your heart...

Brandi Carlile, one of my favorite singers of all time, has a song called "Wherever is Your Heart." The chorus goes like this:

Wherever is your heart I call home

Wherever is your heart I call home

Though your feet may take you far from me, I know

Wherever is your heart I call home.

On days I feel "homesick" for family and friends, I blare this song in my headphones on my bike ride to school.  It grounds me and reminds me that home isn't a geographical place but a feeling, an awareness.  And so, it validates my ability to live away from the US and those we love most.

This past summer Aaron and I were pretty up in the air about whether we were going to move on to another country or head back to Minnesota.  It is a really difficult decision...we love our life abroad, but we also love all of those people who own a little piece of what we call home.  What's going on in the United States right now doesn't help either, and it's MUCH easier to ignore it all while living miles away.

I think it's time we found a way back home

You lose so many things you love as you grow.

That being said, we've officially decided to move back to Minnesota in July.  We dearly miss our community of friends and family. We miss seasons, hygge, and all the skiing and broomball that comes with winter (someone will need to remind us of this one in particular next February).  We miss efficiency. We miss drivers who use turning signals and follow traffic laws. And, honestly, we feel like instead of fleeing from the US, it's time we return to do what little we can to steer our country in another direction (shameless plug: if any of you have connections to teaching jobs, let us know!!).

Even up until yesterday, we (I) were still toying with the idea of sending resumes out to schools in Europe or the Middle East. This life abroad is addicting, and we are incredibly fortunate to have this opportunity. But after a long discussion, both of us feel like going back to the states is the right option for now in our life. I think this blog post is my way of affirming it is actually happening for me as I'm the one who needed most of the convincing...

But we are looking at this move as a way to see another country that has SO much to explore.  The US has many beautiful, alluring places to visit that we want to experience. I'm convinced that if Aaron set foot in Utah or Montana he wouldn't want to leave.  So, it's time that we discover what there is to see in our home country and uncover/celebrate all the good the US has even though it's getting a pretty bad reputation right now in the world.   We've made a pact that we can not leave the US again until we've collectively seen all 50 states.

30 states down, 20 to go!

We are excited, but we also know it's going to be very difficult to leave Colombia. I could go on and on about what we've learned living here.  This is a magical country full of wonderful people with a zest for life. So on that note, if any of you are thinking of visiting, you have 6 months! :)

The Language Lag

Even though we've lived here for 3 years, I'll admit our Spanish isn't as good as it could be.  We practiced a lot our first year and a half: took private lessons, watched TV in Spanish, and tried to have "15-minute Spanish sessions" where we could only speak Spanish to each other for 15 minutes.  Ya...needless to say, that didn't last but our Spanish did improve exponentially our first year. The next year, grad school interrupted our Spanish study as we spent our free time reading and writing papers all in English. Now, we mostly speak English in our day to day with our students, co-workers, and friends.  Honestly, our friends who have improved their Spanish the most are single and have Colombian boyfriends or girlfriends--that is absolutely the way to learn.  Aaron and I have toyed with the idea of getting "language exchange lovers" but decided it might actually be more hurtful than helpful. :)

Now, that being said, our Spanish HAS certainly improved.  Aaron and I are a pretty good Spanish team.  He is great at listening and understanding, where I am better at responding and using correct grammar. :)  However, when I, a textbook visual learner, listen to someone speaking Spanish, "The Language Lag" phenomena (as I've come to call it) is my mortal enemy.  It's that moment of panic and anxiety when I'm at the bank, doctor's office, parent teacher conferences, the grocery store, etc, etc, and the other person is speaking to me and I have absolutely NO clue what the hell they are saying.  In that moment, my heart begins to race, my throat tightens, and I can't even focus on what they are saying because I'm too busy "what if-ing" about not being able to understand what they're saying AND not being able to communicate exactly what I want to say.  Then, the person stops talking to me, stares expecting a response, and I look back at them, wide-eyed, smile, nod, and hope to God what they said isn't important (and of course it usually is). This awkward 3-5 second pause in between the heart palpitating panic and my verbal response is what I call "The Language Lag."

I had two doctor appointments this week. Now, usually, I can avoid "The Language Lag" in situations like this, at least when speaking to the receptionist, because I have context and know the check-in routine. But this time I had another problem: I had no idea if the doctor spoke English or not. For some reason, none of the people I spoke with knew. So, instead of sitting in the waiting room relieved that I was finally seeing a doctor and hopefully they would figure out what was going on, I was frantically typing my obscure symptoms into Google Translate.

I've learned to just laugh at myself, but this is the expat lifestyle. Things like going to the doctor or going to the bank require a Spanish vocabulary brushup while standing in line or sitting in the waiting room.

My notes I frantically wrote down in the waiting room of the doctor's office. 

Luckily this time the doctor spoke great English. I didn't have to use my note sheet, and there was no "Language Lag" to fear!  Living abroad and having these humbling experiences have made me so much more empathetic to immigrants and travelers who move/travel to a new country and don't know the language. Here are a couple things that I try to remember when I am speaking to others who may know some or very little English:

1. Speaking LOUDER doesn't work. If they can't understand you, repeating it louder will just cause more anxiety!!
2. Speaking sloooooower is wayyy less intimidating.
3. E-n-u-n-c-i-a-t-e!!
4. Use simple vocabulary.

(These might seem obvious, but I've had to ask people to do #2 and #4 many times!)

I remember sitting in Wells Fargo last summer in Minneapolis and saw two people turned away because the Spanish interpreter wasn't at that location that day.  It's frustrating!!  But hopefully, with a little bit of awareness and empathy, we can help others avoid the dreaded "Language Lag" and all the anxiety that comes with it.