On Sunday morning I was checking my e-mail, facebook messages, and newspapers as normal when an article in the Winona Daily News caught my attention. There was a single-car accident in which 3 young girls were killed. To my horror, all of these girls attended Lewiston-Altura High School where I taught last year. One of the girls killed was one of my prior students. The sole survivor, an eighth grade girl, is still in critical condition. She is also the penpal of one of my Korean students.
After hearing the news, another one of my former students began talking to me through facebook. She told me how scared she was to drive to school and how she can’t understand why it wasn’t her that died as she drives to school everyday just like those girls. We had a fairly lengthy conversation, and while tears dripped from my lashes to the computer keys, I was reminded of what a precious, beautiful gift life is. It seems it’s not until moments like this that we’re reminded of that truth.
Just the day before, Aaron and I had what I would consider a perfect day with amazing friends. We hiked mountains in the sunshine, baked homemade banana bread, relaxed and watched some Planet Earth, and discussed the ins/outs of life over some Korean BBQ and beer. My thoughts were far from the fear of death or the consideration that this hike or piece of banana bread could be my last.
But that next morning, reading about the story of the girls’ deaths, reminded me of how frank life is. The good, the bad, the sad, the joyful, the boring, the embarrassing, the surprising—these feelings are all real and an inevitable part of what this life has to offer. We’ve always been told, you can’t appreciate the good times without experiencing the bad. Like Yin and Yang or winter and spring, it’s the balance of these emotions/experiences that allows us to live full lives.
And so I asked my student, if we live our lives in fear of death, then how can we truly live? The important thing is to cry, scream, grieve, laugh, smile and embrace each emotion attached to each experience in the present moment, but then, let the emotion go. Our life should be lived for the present moment. Events like what happened to these girls can happen, but we can’t let them hinder our daily lives.
In the case of these girls, today I cry for them, especially Shauna. I remember her smile, her incredible dislike for speech class (well, mostly just talking in front of others;), her sense of humor, and her daily visits to my classroom just to chat. I wish her family and close friends peace, and I hope they can feel her love in this precious present moment.
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